Imagine committing to engage in profound, one-hour conversations with 10,000 individuals. Sound impossible? Enter the fascinating world of Rob Lawless, a man on an extraordinary mission.
Rob is committed to spending an hour in conversation with a staggering 10,000 people. His journey, called Robs10KFriends, is all about making meaningful connections and spreading empathy in a world that has become increasingly digital.
The Roots of Connection
Rob’s story begins in the suburbs of Philadelphia, Norristown to be exact, where he grew up in a tight-knit family. His parents instilled in him the values of trust and love. Rob fondly reminisces, “My parents are still together, and family was always important to them.”
“My dad worked full time and my mom worked part time in a school cafeteria. But there was one thing they did every day that stuck with me over the years. They always made eating dinner together a family priority … it became a sort of sacred ritual for me and my two siblings. We would never eat until my dad came home. We would say grace and talk about whatever came to mind. It really brought us all closer together.”
“As an adult now, I can look back and be reminded of how that taught me the importance of genuine human connections. I think that I’m able to do a project like this because I grew up in a loving environment with the ability to trust and get love from other people. I recognize that’s not the case with many people that I meet.”
The Birth of a Bold Idea
Rob’s journey of connecting with strangers took root in what he describes as an underlying interest in entrepreneurial spirit, an inkling that started during his high school years. As a teenager, he worked for a small financial adviser, a job that taught him you can be successful without working large for a large corporation. He became captivated by the world of entrepreneurship, a fascination he would later pursue as a minor during his time at Penn State University.
However, Rob was offered a lucrative job in the corporate world right out of college, and against his gut instincts, started working for Deloitte. It was an offer he simply couldn’t turn down. And while the job was respectable by most standards, he soon found himself becoming dissatisfied. On paper, he had everything society was telling him to desire. Yet, something didn’t feel quite right.
“When I worked for Deloitte, I was making a great salary, but I wasn’t happy, at all. I had all the stuff you’re ‘supposed to have’, but I always seemed to have one foot out the door,” explains Rob. “As I think back on that time, I believe I felt unfulfilled because I was missing human interaction. At Penn State, I used to know and associate with so many people. But at Deloitte I felt isolated, working in a cubicle. It was like a loss of genuine connection.”
Enter the Purple Cow
“At Deloitte is where I first thought of the idea for Robs10KFriends. I decided that I was going to meet 10,000 people, for 10 minutes each, and complete the entire project in one year,” Rob chuckles. “I think you could say I was very naïve in the beginning. I didn’t plan for anything or even know how I was going to do it.”
Rob initially believed that after meeting 1,000 people, his idea would take off on social media and companies would line up to financially sponsor him. Well, that didn’t happen. And he found the meetings took much longer than 10 minutes – most required an hour, or more, to have meaningful dialogue. Rob realized that the project, if he was to see it through, would take several years to complete. And that meant that he would need to pursue it as a career rather than just a side project. So, that’s what he set out to do.
Rob also loved the project because it became a symbolic idea that fueled his entrepreneurial desires. The number 10,000 also held particular significance, as he related it to a marketing concept called the “purple cow,” a philosophy put forth by one of Rob’s favorite marketing industry influencers, Seth Godin. The idea, akin to spotting a purple cow among a field of ordinary ones, is that the extraordinary can elicit profound reactions, inciting people to stop, share, and remember. Meeting 10,000 people became Rob’s “purple cow”— and he was absolutely convinced that his pursuit of human connection would somehow lead him toward a path of success.
Public Speaking Can Pay the Bills
There were some challenging times early on. In 2018, and with a mere $500 left to his name, Rob struggled to figure out how he could monetize his efforts enough to keep the project going. Despite reaching a point of near financial ruin, he kept moving forward because he was constantly moved by the captivating stories of his subjects, many heartwarming and some tragic. Those experiences profoundly impacted him, instilling a deeper sense of gratitude for his project.
A chance meeting with a woman in Hoboken, New Jersey, would prove life-changing for Rob. “In 2019, I met someone who was sharing her personal story on social media … 100 Days Without Fear … and who later transitioned that topic into speaking engagements … earning roughly $17,000 per appearance. One appearance for her was more than I made during the entire length of my project! She believed I was onto something big and convinced me to pursue the public speaking route.”
Rob got himself an agent and secured his first speaking engagements, which led to more speaking engagements. He also discovered the true power of social media platforms. As he met more people, he gained more followers. More followers led to speaking referrals via direct messages on Instagram.
In fact, this was how Rob ended up as a featured guest on Ryan Seacrest’s radio talk show, and Kelly Clarkson’s television talk show, appearances that put him on the mainstream map. He used these appearances to score more paid speaking appearances at schools, colleges, and companies.
Pandemic + TikTok = Global Expansion
Rob’s project model shifted when the pandemic struck in 2020, shifting his in-person meetings to virtual platforms. This turned out to be a blessing. While many people faced isolation during the pandemic, Rob seized the opportunity to connect with four new people daily, from all over the world. Robs10KFriends went global, seemingly overnight.
Rob credits TikTok as the key medium enabling him to gain an international audience. He recounts posting a single video on the platform which earned him thousands of followers within a short, 24-hour time frame.
“The TikTok experiment was mind blowing,” exclaimed Rob. “It led to thousands of interactions, including international markets. It wasn’t long before I was talking with people from different countries, all around the world.” To date, Rob has engaged in conversations with people from over 90 countries.
When Will He Reach 10,000?
Since the project started, Rob has met with 5,896 people, a little over half way to the end goal. He continues to meet three to four new people every day, maintaining a fervor that remains undiminished since the project’s inception. At his current pace, Rob will meet an average of 600 individuals annually, leaving approximately eight years to reach the 10,000 magic number.
And even though reaching 10,000 is still in the distant future, Rob admits he’s not particularly excited about the project’s conclusion. “I have no idea how I’m going to feel at that point. I’m not super excited about the end, because reaching the end is what gives me a sense of purpose every day.”
“I think it will be more a state of confusion than anything else. It will probably be like, now what? But hopefully I’ll be speaking regularly by then, and at some point, I’d like to teach about human connection in a university setting. I’m also starting to get into the mindset of creating new services or products. For example, how lessons learned from human connection can be applied to customer service in business. I’m consciously thinking outside of the box.”
A Profound Impact
I asked Rob if meeting thousands of people changed him as a person. “The conversations definitely changed me,” he responded. “I was pretty open-minded in the beginning, but now even more so. I learned not to assume things about people. I just sit back and let them tell me who they genuinely are.”
“I usually stick to a formula that works well for my conversations. We talk about four things … family, occupation, recreation, and dreams. Sometimes it devolves into unchartered territory, but I focus on facts people share, rather than sharing opinions about them.”
“As you can imagine, I’ve met some amazing individuals. And many of them I remember because of the chemistry that we shared. Or I may remember certain meetings because of the activity we did together. For example, I remember a guy who took me up in an airplane that he built himself. I went surfing for the first time with a girl I met through my project. I meet most people in a park or coffee shop, so when there’s something like that, it breaks the mold and definitely sticks out.”
Rob Lawless’ journey serves as a poignant reminder that true wealth isn’t measured in possessions or material gain, but in the profound connections we nurture and the empathy we extend to our fellow human beings. Rob has made a career of turning conversations into connections, one chat at a time. And for the record, I was connection number 5,597.
If you’re interested in being a part of Robs10KFriends project, you can reach out to him either through his website or at www.robs10kfriends.com, or on Instagram @robs10kfriends.
